This one time… at my restaurant… this smokin’ hot, totally rich guy asked me out.
To be clear, though, I had no idea this guy had money!
I was an 18 year old single mom working as a waitress in a small family restaurant. It didn’t take much to sweep me off my feet back in those days, so when he came in for breakfast one Sunday morning and laid on the charm, I was instantly smitten.
He gave me a tip and I gave him my number.
HE WAS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT… UNTIL OUR FIRST DATE
He showed up at my door with a bouquet of flowers (for me), and a talking teddy bear (for my 18 month old son). For real? Was this guy perfect or what? If he had dropped to his knee and proposed, I probably would have said “Yes,” right then and there.
But he didn’t propose. Instead, he took me out for a lovely dinner and we had a great time. Afterward, on our way to see a movie, he realized he forgot something at home, so we made a quick detour. No big deal.
Only, when we pulled into the tree-lined driveway and parked in front of the biggest house (dare I say mansion?) I had ever seen, I totally freaked out! OMG! This guy is loaded!
I tried to play it cool. What’s the big deal? So, he’s rich. Why should that matter? I asked myself over and over.
Instead of forming a logical answer, I came up with a mental list of all of the things that turned me off about him: He has a goofy laugh. If he says “Bro” again I’m going to kill myself. He’s not even really that cute. And what’s up with that nose hair? I mean, c’mon haven’t you ever heard of a trimmer?
Seriously, what is wrong with me?
He was perfect in every way less than an hour ago. Then I find out he has money and, just like that, I’m totally turned off?
CLEARLY I HAD ISSUES WITH MONEY. BUT WHY? WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?
I tried to get past it. I took advice from my friends; Tried to give him a chance. But I just couldn’t do it. The attraction was completely gone. There was nothing I could do to bring it back and I honestly couldn’t figure out why.
Why was I so turned off by rich guys?
Then years later- once I discovered The Law of Attraction and started to work on my money mindset- it all began to make sense.
I HAD SOME SERIOUS MONEY BLOCKS!
I grew up poor. Really poor. When my parents divorced, and my mom started dating rich guys, you’d think that life would have gotten better. Instead it was the beginning of the end.
The guys she dated started out amazing. But sooner or later, they’d get bored and end up lying, cheating and leaving her broken hearted and alone. Bit by bit, each relationship stripped away her confidence and self-esteem, until she became so depressed she turned to drugs. She died when I was 15.
I blamed money for killing my mom. Not the drugs. Not her low sense of self-worth. Not her bad choices. It was the money. I hated it. And worse, I feared it. I feared dating men who had it. And I feared earning it.
I was afraid that if I dated a man with money, he’d end up getting bored with me too, and would eventually leave me feeling rejected, abandoned and stripped of my self-worth.
MY MONEY BLOCKS ALMOST DESTROYED MY BUSINESS
These money blocks weren’t just an issue when it came to dating- they were affecting my entire life. They kept me from really embracing abundance, especially after starting a business.
During my first few years in business, I would completely clam up when talking about money with clients.
My fear of rejection was so strong that I purposely kept my rates low to avoid confrontation. After all, how can you argue with a great deal? As long as I didn’t shock anyone with a crazy high prices, they couldn’t reject me.
Then, once I started working with a client, I wanted to make sure that they were so happy they’d never leave. I went above and beyond, bending over backwards to please them. All of my efforts at the expense of my own time, energy, money and sanity.
Eventually, I stared feeling overworked, underpaid and completely burnt out. I was working harder than I ever had, yet I was making less than I would have in a “real job.”
Something had to give! And that’s when I discovered The Law of Attraction and started to work on my Money Blocks.
HOW I RELEASED MY MONEY BLOCKS
It didn’t happen overnight. But I did manage to get past the fear of money. Here’s how I did it:
I FOCUSED ON LOVING MYSELF FIRST
I had to learn that in order to truly feel loved by someone else, you have to start by loving yourself first- truly, deeply and unconditionally.
If you have a healthy relationship with yourself, you’ll have enough confidence and faith in yourself to take risks, bounce back from temporary losses and move forward in the face of rejection.
Because you already have everything you need inside you. You’re not wasting time looking for it in someone else. So your time, energy and focus can be better spent on other things- like creating a better life for yourself.
I SET CLEAR BOUNDARIES
I value what I do and it’s important to me that other people are happy with the services that I provide. But now I know to set clear expectations with clients upfront and keep the lines of communication open at all times.
If something isn’t working, we have a very honest and respectful conversation about it. I look at it like a game. If the rules change- for whatever reason- t’s only right that everybody knows what the new rules are, right?
That’s the only way to play fair. And it’s the only way to create win-win situations where everyone walks away happy.
I LET GO OF MY FEAR OF JUDGEMENT
I know people judge. It’s human nature. But I no longer concern myself with it. I give myself permission to be myself- vulnerable, silly, and imperfect.
I have learned that judgement is a projection of insecurity and instead of feeling anger or resentment toward judgmental people. I actually feel sorry for living in a world of negativity and shame.
I try not to judge. It doesn’t serve me. Instead I am grateful for the differences we all have and believe we can all learn something from the uniqueness each of us brings to the world.
I SURROUNDED MYSELF WITH POSITIVE, LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE
I had to learn that everyone comes into our life for a reason and not everyone is meant to stay. It’s okay to drift apart from people if the relationship loses its spark.
Letting go of negative relationships makes room for more positive ones. I have since made it a point to surround myself with positive like-minded people and have never felt such a strong connection with people in my life.
THE ULTIMATE LESSON
Working through these money blocks has taught me that success doesn’t have to feel isolated and lonely.
It can actually feel uplifting and motivating. And those who really love and care about you, will be there with you along your journey, no matter what.
I now love myself, unconditionally, embrace challenges, and get excited to step out of my comfort zone, try new things and take risks.
I’m not hiding behind my fear anymore. I’m not afraid of money or the people that have it.
I am comfortable in my own skin and confident with the person I am- a women who is free to make her own decisions, embrace success and choose an abundant life.
And that in itself is the most liberating feeling in the world!
HOW TO HEAL YOUR MONEY MINDSET
If you suffer from money blocks (most of us do), there is really only one way to really clear them:
Take purposeful steps to increase your vibrational energy, and heal your mindset so that you can:
- Let go of the negative beliefs that are holding you back
- Embrace the positive thoughts that will ultimately propel you forward toward your goals
Ready to dive right in? There are six steps to achieving a healthy money mindset, raising your vibrational frequency and attracting more abundance into your life.
Check out a the video training I created to help you make it happen here:
Why I care so much….
I’ve experienced adversity, shied away from opportunity and limited myself based on what I believed was truth. I believed money was evil. I believed having money would “ruin my life”.
Once I started to realize that money wasn’t the enemy, I still didn’t feel like I deserved it, and if I did, I lacked the courage to ask for what I believed I deserved.
Money blocks are frustrating and they hold us back. They keep us from embracing our true potential.
But what if we had no limiting beliefs holding us back? What if we felt confident enough to chase our dreams without doubt or fear? What if we could really live a life that fills us with true joy and happiness? What would that look like?
That’s what I want for you!
I want you to feel confident with who you are and what you bring to the world and to have the courage to design a life you love while being open to receiving the abundance you deserve in your life.
My mission is to spread the message of what a difference a healthy money mindset can make, and teach women the tools and skills needed to follow their heart and pursue their dreams.
JOIN THE MOVEMENT & HELP SPREAD THE MESSAGE
I believe everyone deserves to live a rich and abundant life.
If you believe this too, please hit SHARE and help spread this message so that, together, we can change the world by changing the way we think and feel about money. XO