Why would I be afraid of making money, you ask?
Consciously, you might not be. But, we all have conflicting emotions inside of us: the battle between fear and love. And every decision we face – if it threatens to change our current situation and creates an inner conflict in our minds. So even the slightest sliver of fear will shape your success.
Let me paint a picture for you..
IN THIS EPISODE
An old Cherokee tells his grandson that there is a battle between two wolves inside of us. One wolf is evil and full of anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, lies & ego. The other is good and full of joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy & truth.
The boy asks, “Grandfather, which wolf wins?” The old man replies, “The one you feed.”
Love and Fear
We have both wolves inside of us. One wolf represents love and the other represents fear.
Our wolves are fed by the thoughts we internalize. When it comes to money, our stories are created by absorbing the money beliefs of our parents. These come to us through the phrases they use when they speak of money or when they speak directly to you about money. Some examples are: “You have to work hard for money.” or “Rich people are greedy.”
Some things you might have been told include, “You’d better land yourself a rich husband.” or “It’s a good thing you’re pretty…”
Do any of these ring a bell?
The truth is you want to make money. But you’ve got these conflicting emotions inside you. Your wolves are fighting each other. One wolf wants the freedom money will bring and the other is either afraid of getting it, or afraid of trying.
When you give into the fear, the bad wolf wins.
What exactly do I mean by that? Here are some examples of the type of fears we give into that feed the bad wolf, allowing it to win.
- When you let in the fear of becoming someone you don’t like- someone who is bitchy, materialistic, greedy or snobby.
- When you fear being taken advantage of
- When you fear people becoming your “fake friends”
- When you fear that you won’t know how to handle it and you’ll lose it all
- When you tell yourself that having money is the key to success and happiness, and therefore FEAR not having it
You’re feeding the bad wolf!
How to Fix it
Begin by asking yourself a series of questions about the fear.
What is causing that fear? What memory from your past or old belief comes creeping in when you ask yourself WHY you feel that way? Has it happened to someone you know? Why do you think it happened?
Growing up I saw people who had money use it to control other people. They used it as a power tool to get what they wanted and manipulate other people. I saw first hand the way that manipulation destroyed people. My mom was one of those people. Her need for money and her craving for it shredded her dignitary and self worth. I made up the story that money is bad. It makes people manipulative and evil. I never wanted to be that way so I avoided money at all costs – and anyone who had it.
If a guy asked me out and then proceeded to tell me about his Bentley, I was like “see ya, dude! I’m outtie!”
I even dumped a guy once because I found out he was rich… and he was a total catch in every way you can imagine – hot, funny, adorably sweet. But he had money and that was a turn off.
Talk about money blocks!! Right?
The Key Questions to Ask
Once you identify where the fear is coming from, ask yourself:
Is that really true?
Is that likely?
How can I plan and/ or prepare so that I feel safe moving forward?
When you declutter the fear and instead shift your focus to the feelings of joy, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy and truth you realize who YOU really are and you see that money doesn’t define you.
It only helps you create more of those emotions.
Money by itself means nothing. The meaning you give to it has the effect.
If to you, money means you’ll dislike yourself, your subconscious will continue to find ways to sabotage your efforts at making money. After all, no one wants to dislike themselves.
If money means you’ll be subject to emotional pain- i.e. getting taken advantage of, lied to, judged, isolated from your friends, or any other variation of emotional pain, you’re subconscious will do everything it can to keep you safe (aka right where you are now).
If you really want to empower the good wolf, ask yourself how having more money will help you connect to your desired emotions.
Emotions to Focus on Instead of Fear
Even if money changes you, you have a plan. It becomes less scary to take the steps into the unknown. At the end of the day it boils down to you feeling safe. Create an affirmation that makes sense for you.
Let’s Chat More
Head on over to the Facebook Group and let us know what affirmation you have created for yourself to overcome the fear of making money.
- 9:46 Once you identify the fear and where it’s coming from, that’s like first base. You are on your way to clearing those blocks.
- 15:59 Every time fear starts to creep in, ask yourself, “Is this really true? Is this really going to happen or is this a story that I’m making up in my head. Is this fear speaking or is this really me?”
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